Busted

Woke up in a bad mood today, not sure why, but so did all the monkeys. I've busted up two full out, knock down fist fights and as I type, Reaggers is pinching Bub. Someone is gonna die today, and it'll probably be me.

I left my phone down on the dresser to charge this morning and didn't hear the Boss calling to see how we were. She has a meeting downtown this afternoon so she decided to drop off a coke (how does she know exactly when I need one?) and see if the kids had tied me to a chair and that's why I wasn't answering the phone.

Bad timing for me.

Now so far this morning, I cooked scrambled eggs and made OJ for breakfast. I fed, bathed and clothed the baby, loaded the dishwasher, did a load of laundry, picked up and vacuumed the living room, took Bub to the bathroom twice, got the kids dressed, and discovered that I now have to keep the garbage can on a chair because Squizzle has decided that dumpster diving is his new favorite pastime. Oh yeah, I broke up the fights and played bouncer for the upstairs toy room.

Does the Boss get to see me anxiously engaged in any of these activities? No, she walks in the second after Squizzles wakes up screaming, the kids spread Dora the Explorer Memory game cards all over the floor, and I, having just a moment before sensed a second for myself, sat down to play a few hands of play poker on the Internet (don't get all wrinkled up, its PLAY poker. As if I could even afford penny poker!). But Vicconian Chaos is erupting around me while I get caught red handed playing a video game.

How's that for bad Karma?

To her ever blessed credit, the Boss refrained from making several wise acre remarks that based on the evidence before her would have been well justified. She handed me the drink, teased me about not having had a heart attack to explain not picking up the phone, and left for her meeting without a word about the train wreck before her eyes. Patience has always been her strong suit, much to my eternal gratitude.

Well, enough for now. Peff just spilled his OJ, Reaggers is jumping off the back of the couch, Bub needs to go Potty, and Squizzles is making a run at the trash can again.

And my three aces just got popped by a flush on the river.

I told you my Karma sucks.